EVACUATION ROUTE

There are times that the storm is so wicked you can’t seem to escape it. No matter what you do you can’t break free of the cyclone that is crashing in around you. And then…you begin to think about it. You think about it more and more and more. And it becomes stronger and stronger until it has completely consumed your being.

How do you escape the thoughts of the storm? How do you get away and free yourself? The storm seems so strong you’re afraid you might drown.

Ever experienced this? These hopeless feelings of doom where no matter which way you look there seems to be no way out. I’ve been there many times. Too, many to count. And looking back to those circumstance I realized my focus was me and my storm. And that’s all I wanted to focus on. I didn’t want to even fathom the thought of thinking about something else.

In times of a troubled mind we need an evacuation route. Just like people who live on the coast need to know what route to take to escape the hurricane before hits land. Except at this point, our mind is already so consumed with the thoughts of our personal storm that it’s not just hit land it’s embedded upon our being.

More than ever that’s the exact time we need to reach to God. He is our evacuation route. If we cast our fears upon Him He can bring a comfort like no other. He meets us and accepts us right where we are.

He already knows the circumstances. This is a time that needs an evacuation route and that route can be found through prayer. And there is no wrong way to pray. Ever! In my most precious moments of prayer when I can’t think of what to say, I simply whisper, “Jesus. Please help me.”

He is waiting for us to reach to Him. He wants nothing to steal the joy He has given us. NOTHING!

“Consider it pure joy, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know the testing of your faith builds perseverance. Perseverance must be complete so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” James 1:2-4

Take the evacuation route. Get out of you mind and stop allowing those thoughts to steal your God-given joy.

Blessings~

Bo

09-25-2014 

Chasing Lightening Bugs

The days have been steamy hot with, little to, no breeze. Last night, I was pleasantly surprised by the temperature when I took my dogs outside to play. As one of my 

fur-babies rolled in the grass the other played ball. I believe they, too, were happy to welcome the break of intense heat.

Then, something caught my eye. It was a flash. No, it’ was a small flicker of light in the field behind my house. I experienced one of those moments where you see or hear something and you hold your breath and try not to move until it happens again. And, then, there it was again. And again! And again! Little flickers of fluorescent lights, everywhere.

LIGHTENING BUGS!!

It had been many, many years since I’d seen lightening bugs lighting up the dark like that. I was tickled with excitement. As I sat and watched the light show I reflected back on memories from my childhood. I remembered the joy I had as a little girl just knowing that as the sun began to settle down there, without a doubt, would be thousands of flickering lights for me to run and chase, in hopes of catching. I would see the light, run to it and do everything in my power to catch it. And even though I’d go right to the light, I’d never see the bug unless it was lit up.

Are you old enough to remember those simple days of summer? Can you hear the belly laughter from your inner child and feel the excitement within?

What if? Just, what if…..we chased after God like he was a lightening bug? The excitement! The laughter! Just the joy in knowing He is your faithful light in the field of darkness and He is there even when you don’t see Him.

He is that little flicker of light that brings hope.

He is waiting for us to chase after him with childlike faith and allow Him to light up our world.

What are you waiting for?

Blessings~

Bo

6/21/2014

In The Blink of An Eye

Last weekend my son, Tyler, and his sweetheart, Heather, exchanged wedding vows and began their life partnership. It was beautiful; to say the least.

This photo was taken by The Lovely Lens Photography in St. Louis, Missouri.
 Do not crop or edit this photo in any way.

This afternoon as I sit relaxing under a tree, I’m thinking of all that has come to pass. It’s as though it happened in a blink of an eye. Some things I simply didn’t see and many are a blur.

When I say the wedding was beautiful I don’t mean the bride. She was beyond beautiful. Her everyday beauty, inside and out, is breathtaking. However, on their wedding day she was simply stunning. You could not take your eyes off of her.

Only a few pictures from their photographer, Tammi Camp of The Lovely Lens Photography in St. Louis, Missouri (whom I highly recommend) have been revealed. The other photos I have seen are from family and friends. Looking through those photos I have found myself saying, “I didn’t see that!” or “Where was I?” or “I don’t remember that!” And in my small realm of a mind it’s hard to grasp that those moments happened and I didn’t see or experience them. Especially on the wedding day of my only child.

I don’t have the best memory in the world, but is it possible our minds get so overloaded we literally don’t remember? Before arriving in St. Louis for the wedding my mind was already in a world of chaos. Living states away I simply was not able to be a part of the things I wanted and desired to be part of. I’m sure if I say, “Little girls dream of their wedding day all their lives” you know exactly what I mean. Well, a Mom dreams of things for her children’s wedding day as well.

This is not something I really want to share, but am led to do so. Being brutally honest with myself and sharing with the world I must admit.... there were times when the beast within my body reared its head. My tongue! I allowed my emotions to react and my tongue to whip all because of my own insecurities and selfishness. I’m sad to say, more than once.

Regardless of who you are I’m pretty certain you’ve experienced something similar like this in your lifetime, and maybe even on a daily basis.

James 3:2-5 (ERV)

We all make mistakes. A person who never said anything wrong would be perfect. Someone like that would be able to control their whole body too. We put bits into the mouths of horses to make them obey us. With these bits we can control their whole body. It is the same with ships. A ship is very big, and it is pushed by strong winds. But a very small rudder controls that ship. And the one who controls the rudder decides where the ship will go. It goes where he wants it to go. It is the same with our tongue. It is a small part of the body, but it can boast about doing great things.

…..and can whip in a blink of an eye! Could this be the reason there are things I didn’t see, or why things seem a blur? Has my mind blocked things from pure shame?

I recently read…… When our hearts desire something more than this world can give, God isn’t ashamed to be called our God.

I jotted that down in my journal and unfortunately I didn’t make note of where I read it. I like to give credit where credit is due.

Those words stuck me like a ball bat. I wanted and desired to be part of things of this world that really didn’t matter. I allowed myself to focus on them and in turn said and did things that should have never been said or done. The words of what I read gave me the assurance that God still loves me even though my focus was not on Him. It was of the world.

Ever since I wrote that statement down I’ve been praying that God would show me a moment during the wedding that wasn’t blurry. For Him to guide me to let go of my focus on, “what I did or didn’t get to do” and “what I did or didn’t get to see.”

In James 4:2 God tells us, “You have not, because you ask not.”

I prayed and asked. He delivered. He not only reminded me of one thing, but several.

1. I was wanted and needed there for my love and support. (No matter what the darkness of my mind said. And even after my tongue got the best of me.)
2. On this day my son was happier than I’ve ever seen him. The glow of his joy filled that entire church.
3. But nearest, dearest and forever etched on my heart and soul…… When I entered the doorway to be ushered down the aisle as mother of the groom, I was not escorted by an usher. My son, whom was standing in the front of the church with his best man and groomsmen came down the aisle, took my arm in his and proudly escorted me to my seat.

These are the things that really matter.

 

This photo was taken by The Lovely Lens Photography in St. Louis, Missouri.
Do not crop or edit this photo in any way.

For those reading who attended the wedding…… This journal is the best I can explain anything. If my actions affected you, I am deeply sorry and pray for your forgiveness.

Blessings~

Bo

06/07/2014

BOREDOM OR ABUNDANT LIVING by Ruth Youngdahl Nelson

I’ve been a little quiet lately. A little reflection happening in my life. All good stuff! Details soon!!!

Tonight as I was spending a little time reading I came across a devotion that I just had to share. 

I DID NOT WRITE THIS!

BOREDOM OR ABUNDANT LIVING

By Ruth Youngdahl Nelson

“The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.” John 10:10

Housewives bored with life are top drug users, concludes a study.

It is sad when people find life boring and take to artificial means to either stimulate or dull their God-given senses. It is particularly sad because the One who brings fulfillment and excitement and joy stands at each heart’s door knocking. But the thief is also there, the thief who comes to steal and kill and destroy. Who is this thief?

As simplistic as it sounds, it is nevertheless eternally true, that thief is embodied in the one letter “I.” “Navel gazing” is no newfangled occupation. Since the beginning of time it has been man’s chief foe. The “poor me” attitude, the stench of self-pity, repels other people and shuts out God.

That big “I” is the only vowel and the middle letter in the word “sin.” How well I remember my confirmation pastor writing those three letters on the chalkboard. Then he told us this same “I” is the blockage between us and heaven. If we permit the Holy Spirit to take hold of the “I” and bend it around until each ends meets, it becomes “0” – zero, nothing. Then the transformation happens, and “sin becomes son,” God’s son. As he takes over our lives, heaven enters our hearts here and now. He is also the means for the gate to be wide open to the hereafter.

I read a lot of devotions. But this particular one really touched my heart. So true in the fact that….we get in our own way. We do more damage than anyone else by having a simple vocabulary of the word “I.”

My prayer is for those struggling with that “I” stronghold. Cry out and allow the Holy Spirit to captivate your heart and meet you right where you are. He doesn’t wait for you to fix it. He will create that transformation as long as you invite Him in.

Blessings~

Bo

5/22/2014

No Matter What May Come

The past few days have been beautiful! Not to cold; not to hot. It’s been about 68 degrees with a nice breeze. Flowers are beginning to bloom. Perfect weather for a hoodie, shorts and flip flops! 

I am lovin’ it!!

Just last week school was called off because of flooding. It had rained so hard for 3 or 4 days that the ground was just saturated. It literally could not hold or absorb any more water. In fact, when I stepped out in the yard water would come up over my shoe from the ground. But, within 24 hours the water had receded in some places yet other areas still looked like a lake existed in that spot. Those “lakes” on normal occasions would be a field.

Even with this recent change in the weather, looking back over the past couple weeks, it’s been a little crazy. (Not me, the weather) Ha!

A few weeks ago we were buried beneath ice and snow….a LOT of it!!

I’m not sure where you live or what type of winter weather normally hits your area, but here in southern Indiana it seemed like we were under ice and snow f-o-r-e-v-e-r! Everyone had a case of cabin fever…..especially the parents with kiddo’s who couldn’t go back to school after their Christmas break. (Thank you, God, for Tyler being way beyond school age!)

Here’s my question.

Did you complain about the weather?

*when we had all the ice and snow?

*when we were being drenched with thunderstorms?

*when we had sunny skies the past couple days?

This is the Lord’s doing. It is marvelous in our eyes. This is the day the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it!! (Psalm 118:23-24)

No matter what may come.

Blessings,

Bo

4-11-2014

NO PROBLEM or BIG PROBLEM

I watched my mother be 1,000% devoted to my granny when the time came in my granny’s life that she couldn’t care for herself. It always amazed me – the sacrifice mom made to care for her mother. She always promised my granny that she would get the best possible care and that care would be from her. I never understood it.

 

G.G. - December 2001

My mom gave up everything to insure that my granny was happy, comfortable and well taken care of. One thing my mother took great pride in was her flower garden. It was beautiful! That garden had so many different types of flowers and they bloomed from spring to fall. She loved fresh flowers in her house but most importantly it brought her great joy to cut a bunch of fresh flowers for someone else and surprise them with a beautiful bouquet.

She gave it all up for my granny.  She left her house, her furniture and the beautiful garden to move into my granny’s home with my granny’s furnishings. A home that needed many repairs and wasn’t in the best neighborhood. But, none of that mattered. What mattered was my granny was comfortable in her surroundings and she was receiving the best possible care. As for flowers…my granny was highly allergic to them and could not have them in her house. But, that didn’t matter.

We lost my granny in 2007. She was a wonderful feisty woman who is greatly missed by all, every day.

During the years my mom cared for my granny I always told her, “Mom, when the time comes that you can no longer care for yourself you better hope Scot (my brother) is willing to take you in and care for you because I’m not giving everything up like you did. If he isn’t willing, then you will be in a nursing home because I’m not going to do it.”

I meant those words whole-heartedly. And she knew it. I saw what she went through with my granny. It wasn’t something I was ever going to do. EVER!

A few years ago mom hurt her knee. It healed and recently she injured it again and it required surgery. The doctor said it just needed to be a simple scope procedure. I was willing to help her for a few days until she was back on her feet. No problem!

I love my mom and she knows it. And, I know she loves me. There are no doubts about our love for each other. But, we are both big control freaks and we don’t always see eye-to-eye.

Her surgery was on Monday, March 24, 2014. After the procedure the doctor came to talk to me and said there was more damage than he thought. She had 2 tears. One small one on the inside of her knee, and a very large one on the outer side of her knee. The one on the outer side was large enough that the tissue flapped over. This meant he had to do more work than expected and she was going to be in pain and she needed to stay off of her leg as much as possible for the next week. No problem!

They sent her home with crutches. But she didn’t walk with them out of the hospital, they wheeled her out in a wheelchair. No problem!

BIG PROBLEM! When I got her home I realized 1.) she had no clue how to walk on crutches and 2.) she was way to groggy from medication to balance herself. No problem! Someone had given us a walker “just in case” she needed it. (Thank God!)

BIG PROBLEM! She really didn’t know how to walk with a walker either and was too groggy to do it by herself. No problem! Her gal-pal, Nancy was home to help me get her to her room, changed and into her bed. No problem! Nancy then left to go to work. I was on my own. Someone had also given us a bedside potty to use. I thought “great!” No problem!

Even though mom was groggy and being a good patient her control side emerged and she wanted to do it by herself. She wanted to do it her way but, she didn’t understand she couldn’t because she was groggy and she didn’t have balance. BIG PROBLEM! Hello… introducing MY control freak. The more she insisted the more aggravated I became.

All the walking, changing clothes, getting in bed not only wore her out it wore me out. Her pain intensified and it was almost impossible to help her get out of her “high off the ground” bed and onto the bedside potty, which was less than a foot away.

It wasn’t even 5 hours after her surgery that my thoughts began. “I can’t do this. I don’t want to do this. I said I would never do this.”….even though I knew this was a temporary situation and not the time of her life where she needed daily and forever care.

BIG PROBLEM!

I knew in that instant I needed to not only pray myself but reach out to some of my church sisters and ask them to pray for my attitude. So, I sent out a group text message being totally honest of how I was feeling. I didn’t hold back. I shared it all. I received the responses I knew would come:

“I’m praying.”

“Here for you. Just let me know what I can do.”

“I’ll fix you dinner and come help.”

Those responses helped calm me down. I was content.

No problem!

Then I received a private text from my darling sister in Christ, Mindy. It read (quote)

“Remember that God made her your momma. He set her in that position. Serve God not your momma. You be Jesus to her and let God be God.”

BIG PROBLEM! 

My attitude.

Those words took me to my knees in shame. I know they were not said to make me feel shameful but to help me be the LOVE of Jesus. And in that very instant everything lifted. All of my anxiety, frustration and attitude were gone.

28 WORDS!

From that moment I saw things with new sight. Those words took my heart to a totally different level of love. They opened the eyes of my heart.

You see, I saw a “deed” or “task” that needed to be done. Not a serving to God but, a chore. Not a delight, honor, or privilege as it should be seen.

Hours later when Nancy got home we decided to move mom from her room with the high bed to the guest room with a normal bed. No problem!

What we didn’t realize was mom was still groggy from pain medication and she still didn’t know how to walk with crutches or a walker. (Not that she couldn’t, but she didn’t know the proper way to do so in order to not inflict an injury). With one of us in front steadying the walker and one of us behind her just in case she lost her balance it took us 15 minutes to get from one room to the other, and they were side by side.

Before we got her to the bed she started to shake, saying she was cold. In a matter of seconds her shaking intensified to the level of an uncontrollable, teeth chattering shake. And there was absolutely nothing we could do. We couldn’t rush her into a position on the bed or we could injure the leg that just had surgery. We didn’t think to turn on the electric blanket to warm the bed because it was a quick decision and the room was cold. It’s a guest room and it’s not used very often.

Like chickens with our heads cut off we began moving rapidly trying to get her covered up and warm. One of us ran to the dryer with a blanket and turned it on while the other tried to untangle blankets and get her covered as she laid on cold sheets. And I mean cold!

BIG PROBLEM! 

There was absolutely nothing I could do to warm her any faster. Even laying next to her waiting for the warm blanket from the dryer – it seemed like hours watching her shake uncontrollably. Once the blanket was warm we placed it under the other blankets against her body…and we waited. She slowly began to stop shaking.

Huge sigh of relief. She is now warm. No Problem.

BIG PROBLEM!

I now have to uncover her to put the ice contraption back around her knee. My heart sank. I felt horrible. When I told her what I had to do these huge tears appeared in her eyes and she softly said, “ok.”

What seemed like a massive lump in my throat happened as I pulled the warmth off her body in order to put ice on her knee. I felt like the cruelest person in the world.

I wonder if Jesus ever felt that lump in his throat?!?

I stood by her bedside and watched her slowly – and I mean slowly – start to relax and drift back into a state of grogginess. (Thank you, God!)

I knew she wouldn’t rest long and I knew I needed rest as well since I had only had 1 ½ hours of sleep in 48 hours. So, I curled up in bed and set my alarm for 2 hours. She didn’t even rest for 2 hours. Her bladder called. No problem! We had this challenge mastered!!

BIG PROBLEM!

She had exhausted all her strength. There was nothing left. Her arms were flimsy from holding herself up on the walker and her weak leg was tired from trying to do all the work.

It was 1:30am. Even though I was drained of energy I developed a strength that only God could provide. I’m a fluffy kinda girl and so is my momma. But in that fragment of time I was able to hold both of our weights to move her from the bed to the potty and back to the bed. It was truly supernatural strength!

 

Me and Mom - Summer 2012

As I got her tucked back in bed she began to weep. I bent over to ask what was wrong thinking she was going to tell me she was in pain, however her words were, “ I’m sorry but thank you for taking care of me. I know it’s something you really don’t want to do.”

BIG PROBLEM!

I sat on her bed, snuggled as close as I could and held back the tears in order to not allow her to get even more upset. The words that I had spoken for so many years – words that were not only etched in her head but in her heart, confronted me face to face. My words. My words!

If only she knew the 28 words. Words that had been shared with me hours before. Words that changed the way I felt about caring for my momma. Powerful words that changed my mind on who would care for her years down the road when she could no longer care for herself.

This life event is only temporary. Her knee will heal. The pain will subside. The strength and endurance will return and she will be back outside tending to her beautiful property and delightful flowers. And when this temporary stage is over and she is back up on her feet I will share those 28 words with her. I will then forever begin to tell her that she too, like my granny, will receive the best possible care. It will be me and it will be my honor to serve God and be like Jesus for her. NO PROBLEM!

So when you’re challenged with a task that you really don’t want to do please let yourself be reminded of these 28 words, even though it may not have anything to do with your momma.

“Remember that God made her your momma. He set her in that position. Serve God not your momma. You be Jesus to her and let God be God.”

Blessings!

Bo

03/25/2014

4:46am

DEAR TYLER....

  

Dear Tyler,

  

As I embrace another sleepless night, my mind is filled with thoughts of you. Ninety days from now you will marry your best friend. The woman you chose to be your life partner. Your confidante. Beautiful Heather.

                It seems like yesterday you were this tiny little man-cub 

Remembering back……

                                       There are so many 1^st’s …..

     

                           

           Denny made one very cool bed!                 

                       

 You jumped without even thinking. Even today you step forward in faith.

          

        

Remember peeking under Uncle Mike’s Tux Tail to see what was under there?  Everyone.... cracked up!

We've been through some scary stuff! Who would have ever thought while you and friends were out smashing pumpkins that a stick would be thrown and make direct contact with your eye. You spent 2 weeks in the recliner with no tv, no video games, no over excitement. That was a very LONG 2 weeks. Praise God there was no serious damage done.

                                               

                         

              Aw, the joy of the twins. 

                  Such fun!!

        

                            Your 1st vehicle......and you buried it! 

                            You've had more than one stuck truck.

                           

                     

Just the beginning of gauged ears!

                                   

                                Happy 21^st Birthday!

             The only beer I’ve ever bought you!

                

                                                                                                                                                             One of 3 precious gifts of our extended family: 

The J-5 Crew

Words will never describe the joy I had when these pictures arrived in my email. You have been called since the 1st breath you took.

Many have been touched my your love and compassion. As                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                

One of my favorite pictures you have ever taken. You have such a knack in capturing the coolest shoots.

Can you hear her purr?

   

                                                             

             

Brothers from other Mothers. 

This is the 2nd truck that got stuck!

                                             

This picture will never express the heartfelt sorrow we experienced as we drove through Henryville that day. Such devastation was done. And the lens couldn't capture the path because it was so wide.

And you took that solitaire diamond and created one of the most beautiful rings I've ever seen.  

                                      

And she said, 'YES!!"

A BIG decision you and Heather made together. To sponsor a child through World Vision. And what a wonderful blessing for Djeneba to have sponsors.

            

Another Brother from another Mother.

Shawn is one of your closest and dearest friends.

He has done so much for us.

Love you Shawn!!.....aka......"George"           

Never in a million years

would I have dreamed I'd see you

in a bow tie.                                      

But I loved it!

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                               

    Above all else I know Heather is your 1^st True Love.

So, as we begin the final countdown to your wedding day, I anxiously anticipate seeing the joyous & infectious smile on your face when you say,“I DO!” Because at that very moment I know you will be happier than ever before and that, in and of itself, will warm my heart abundantly.

1 Corinthians 1:4-5

I always thank my God for you and for the gracious gifts he has given you, now that you belong to Christ Jesus.  In him you have been blessed in every way. He has blessed you in your speaking and all your knowledge.

You have grown into an outstanding and loyal man of God and I am so proud of you in every aspect. You are my greatest blessing and I love you!!!

Love,

          Momma

3/2/2014 – 90 days before you wedding.